I’ve been thinking a lot about love and what it means to live in love. What it means to be committed to love.
Love is love!
Love is the shift!
Love is all around us!
A move from fear to love!
All you need is love!
You hear people say these things all the time and it turns out this is actually pretty hard when you read the news or see how people are in comments on social media or you see how people even are on the street!
I think a big part of it is normalization. In a world where so many people are hurting and in need of love, we almost conserve our capacity to care and localize it only to the people that mean something to us. Everyone else outside of the inner circle is a STRANGER.
The idea of extending love to strangers is preposterous.
Even to those we care for!
A lot of us will take them for granted one day and sort of stop being so “loving”.
The idea of intimacy and affection are also localized mostly to lovers or at least very close friends and maybe parents.
I understand the impulse to want to conserve feelings, but I guess I think this is a learned thing. You’re taught not to talk to strangers, to fear the unknown, to doubt pioneering ideas so much that you don’t do them.
I wish it were different. I wish we instead were taught to extend human decency to everyone we encounter. I wish love was more casual.
I think we can do it.
I don’t think our heart gets crowded or tired of loving.
I think we can find a way to extend love to those we don’t know yet, those we disagree with and those we can’t fathom. I challenge myself to see this in people that I believe are “the problem”. The keepers of the “fear based” world. The xenophobic, homophobic, misogynistic haters of progress, inclusivity and sensitivity. If they never learned better. If every adult they encountered encouraged these values and taught them they had to be this way to survive and thrive in this world then they never did have a choice.
Their passion and determination comes from their seeking. And they’re seeking what all of us are seeking. Love, acceptance, expansion, a comfortable life, a sense of power and ability.
I can’t always do it, but if I can remember that the people I have such negative feelings about are driven by the same needs I’m driven by, I can see them with more compassion.
Which is the first step I can make towards loving them.
If I am to be a lover, I can’t discriminate.
I must love all.